Celebrate: What’s the best that we can take forward?
Moments only come once in a lifetime. The moment it’s gone, it’s gone. Just thought it’d be timely to pause and take stock of what has happened in 2020, what is worth celebrating, and what’s the best we can take forward?
I was looking at my diary which i started this year, and found some questions to structure my reflections:
How can you double joy? Or even increase it by just 1%?
How can you double what’s working for you?
How can I better support people around me?
How do I rest?
What’s truly the next level for me? What would the ideal infrastructure look like?
This break has been incredibly healing on a personal and spiritual level. I haven’t really felt so connected with myself in a long time. When I look back at my diary, I notice feelings of stress, overwhelm and exhaustion happened quite regularly, and i couldn’t find the space to celebrate given my packed schedule. So I am real thankful for this breathing space to pause, notice and reflect!
In general, I felt pretty light the past week, and felt a sense of peace that everything is going to work out fine.
I also learnt that celebration is a practice! Sometimes we only celebrate the significant moments, like birthdays - but it’s actually the celebration that makes the moment significant. And i want to create more of such significant moments in my life. We can start by asking, what is worth celebrating today? in this moment, right now?
Caveat: What works for me may not work for you, simply because we are different people. What you could do is to notice what surfaces as you answer these questions, what thoughts/feelings do you notice as you read my responses perhaps? It could trigger experiences you are longing for, back memory lane.
1. How can you double joy? Or even increase it by just 1%?
I noticed that when I sing and play my guitar, time still flies. Sometimes i think music has these very deep pull for me, like it’s hard to pull me out when i’m in the ‘zone’. It’s one of the those things that makes my time fly - I remember the times i used to spend hours in the dance studio in my final year of university, alone, and it was a space free from worries and anxieties.
I noticed that when i manage to create deeper connection with people, it energises me as well. And sometimes that is just telling them what I truly feel.
Actionable steps to choose from:
Create an infrastructure/system that allows me space to have fun with music: could look like going for dance classes, doing covers on a regular basis. It could be guitar jam time on a weekday evening of my choice.
Am running two learning circles related to Enneagram and Personal development, to do my utmost to bring my full presence, to bring value and fertilise these relationships!
2. How can you double what’s working for you?
You are only entitled to the action, never to its fruits.
- Bhagavad Gita
I noticed that i get most things done in the mornings, my energy and concentration is the highest here so it would be great to maximise this momentum. I am most creative and focused in the mornings, after a yoga session!
I discovered through my coaching session with Ervin that working together in teams or just with someone helps me in getting things done, especially tasks i feel resistant too. This has worked really well for openjio, and some work related tasks.
I notice that setting aside time for myself in the morning instead of diving straight into work makes me feel more alive. It’s about recognising and prioritising myself too, that I am important. Sometimes I leave till the end of the day to ‘treat’ myself, but by then i’m already too tired to enjoy this time with myself. Setting aside time for myself could look like doing yoga, writing, setting the intention of who i want to be and what do i want to do.
Actionable steps to choose from:
To start my day with energy, have a short 15 min yoga before breakfast everyday. Really clears my mind.
When I am stuck at something for 20mins or more, get support from people around me!
3. How can I better support people around me?
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
- Proverbs 4:23
I am always inspired by how we can grow together, in fuller presence, in wholeness. Supporting me could look like a listening ear, working together with me. Sometimes we often do not know how to support people though we want to…but it could be asking a simple question to understand and clarify.
Actionable steps to choose from:
Notice my own intentions. Ask ‘How are you’ or ‘How can I support’ only when I am truly willing to hold space on focus on the person. Why is it important to me?
Ask, “How can I support you?”
I feel like the questions I learn from circling would be very useful here. Refer to my Circling reflections here.
4. How do I rest?
Self-care is not selfish. Self-care means giving the world the best of you instead of what is left of you.
- Anthea Ong
I think one blessing covid has brought is that since everything outside is closed, it opens up the space for people to look inwards. I think it was one of the factors that led to the birth of this blog! For me, rest is about connecting with myself, my true needs and wants; being able to connect with my feelings even though it may be uncomfortable. Listening to my own voice.
It’s basically doing things that give me energy, and knowing what I do is not about achievement, and about enjoying the process. Knowing when is ‘enough’. Taking time to connect and celebrate with people.
Actionable steps to choose from:
Building connection: Regular conversations with close friends to check-in, how we can support each other
Meditation, taking time to notice what my body is telling me. Often when i feel heaviness in my head and body, it means i already over-exerted myself.
5. What’s truly the next level for me? What would the ideal infrastructure look like?
Maintaining this blog - writing weekly reflections. It’s about creating space for myself, and allowing my intentions to be known.
Maintaining the learning circles, show up in full presence and serve the group.
I think the next level is to attempt to coach people too...but i am having doubts about myself on this, like i need to do more self-work; yet it makes me excited!
Infrastructure: Starting small, asking for support from people around me, declaring my intentions so that i can hold myself accountable. Just like how i am using this blog for that!!
Thank you for reading :) Would be curious to know how these questions and reflections landed for you! What are some things you learnt about yourself that surprised you?